Written by Susan Lane

The Fridge Monster and The Chocolate

I am so full; I’m completely rammed
No room at all, not even for something really small
The lady of the house I spy again
A large glass of drink in her hand

It’s quite amazing that during her foray
I can’t even hide when she’s on her way
The space is so tight and the freezer
He’s in my way; no help at all
He just watches; I feel such a fool

In actual fact no-one helps
When she comes to call
Confectionary is the only thing
I’m hiding that is sweet
So, I’ve come to the conclusion
She fancies me

And looking for chocolate
It's just her excuse to see me
I definitely think she could be
Severely infatuated with me
Cos she visits me so regularly

Would you believe, she’s got no class
This monster human with her Asti-filled glass
I can’t believe it’s that time of day
“It’s nice to see you,” I say
Not a peep comes my way
I thought she was just coming to see me
But it would seem she’s only looking
For a certain food to eat

She’s only here to raid my shelves
For that sweet treat
I’ve got three bars at the back
Well-hidden. Hehe.

Fridge Love or Disillusionment

They’re in the salad drawer.
That’s not a place she’d look
Trust me, I’ve been here before
For what seems an eternity 
Standing on this kitchen floor

It’s such a blessing to me
That she really does love and cherish me
But that, of course I already knew
That’s why I protect 
Her little store and I had to be sure
That none of it would fall out onto the floor

Oh, damn and blast, she found it again
She doesn’t even offer me a chunk
Now that’s mean
I’ve got to think harder between now and next week
That is when she’ll come to play hide and seek

It does her no good; in fact, it makes her a wreck
She bloats up, then gets all upset
She’s her own best enemy yet
But what I haven’t mentioned you see
Is if I have run out of chocolate, then
The backup is in the cupboard
I’ve got the cream

I know the secret that she hid from me
That nice big family
Cappuccino and chocolate cake
In the top cupboard on the highest shelf
Away from me
And I’ve only just figured out
She doesn’t really care about me

I’ve been disillusioned; can’t you see
I really love her but she doesn’t
Love her fridge; she doesn't even like me
She is only nice to me to get at my goodies
Oh, woe is me! Someone, please, get me a hanky

© Susan Lane. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored, or transmitted in any form without prior written permission from the author.

ColourMine poetry, and the original photographs, are completely authentic to myself, Susan Lane – no AI, no plagiarism, all checked and verified by copyleaks

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